This is “gallows” humour / satire – a bit like the coping strategy doctors and nurses use when dealing with horrific tragedy. THIS IS NOT MEANT TO BE SERIOUS.
It’s really meant to show just how ridiculous the whole business of trying to put an innocent woman to death really is. From an original post here, probably written when I was feeling a bit stressed or something…
Ok, I know I’m going to be severely criticised when this turns out to be wrong, but anyway…
Jodi Arias Season 2 opens January 2014, death penalty retrial.
Jodi calls 50 domestic violence supporters and 20 jail mates, who testify that she saved them from a violent abuser and that she does their legal work for them respectively.
In May 2014, after a 20 week second season, the jury cannot agree on DP for a second time, and judge Pickles sentences her to life without parole… ( or with the possibility if the law is changed, it makes no difference ).
In June 2014, Lifetime show their second Jodi film, “Jodi Arias and the gas cans”… hmm, not sure that is very hot, maybe it flops. Jodi sells 5 thousand T-shirts.
In January 2015, Jodi Arias Season 3 opens, the charges are now down to Felony Murder, Second Degree Murder and Manslaughter.
In May 2015, the jury convicts Jodi of Felony murder, and once again judge Pickles sentences her to life without parole. ( I’m skipping the penalty phase here… could add an extra season ).
In June 2015, Lifetime show their third Jodi film, “Jodi Arias Nicked a Gun?” Jodi sells 5 million T-shirts. In November, some appeal court overturns the Felony murder conviction on a point of law.
In January 2016, Jodi Arias Season 4 opens, the charge is still Felony murder, but now with Judge Pickles theory ( she assaulted him before murdering him, THAT was the Felony ).
In May 2016, the jury again convicts Jodi of Felony murder, and once again judge Pickles sentences her to life without parole.
In June 2016, Lifetime show their fourth Jodi film, “Jodi Arias Mutant Ninja”. In October, some appeal court overturns the latest Felony as well, on some point of evidence (blood on the toilet perhaps). Jodi sells 50 million T-shirts, and is named “Woman of the Year”. Jodi appears live with Nigella Lawson on a “cooking Christmas dinner in Prison special”, and wins her 5th Carol singing competition. Barry Gibb sings to millions at Woodstock.
In January 2017, in Season 5, with the charge down to 2nd degree murder, Jose Baez acts for Jodi, with 3D life-like reconstruction sponsored by Disney, and demonstrates what actually happened, and Jodi is finally acquitted a mere 12 years after being arrested. Speedy trial indeed,
( Of course guilt phase hung juries could add a lot more seasons…, Lord help her if she gets into a blood-spatter duel of “experts”. Since truth is often stranger than fiction, maybe things will get a lot weirder than my limited imagination… or will sanity finally break out… nobody knows )
- Trial Index
- Jodi Arias Trial: Five Things to Watch for Between Now and July 18 Phoenix New Times – their predictions generally seem pretty accurate.
- David Camm David is being tried a third time after being twice wrongfully convicted by bogus blood spatter evidence, despite having a solid alibi.
- The Jodi Arias Trial Season 1 Finale Janice Harper, Anthropologist
- Dirty Little Secret
- Amanda Knox voted Italian ‘woman of the year’ Telegraph, January 2009
- The Nine Tailed Fox
- The search for the Femme Fatale ( a.k.a. Witch )
- Legal Jokes on Facebook